“I Don’t Know How Those Files Got on My Computer!”

I’ll bet you’ve heard that line on the news, or read it in the paper, usually uttered by someone who’s been caught doing something you and I don’t even want to think about.  “Yeah, right,” we think, “gremlins put those files there.”

Well, this evening I opened a folder titled “SavedFromMail” on my computer, and there are some very strange pictures in there.  No, not that sort of strange.  Just pictures I can’t believe I ever meant to save.  For that matter, I don’t think I created that folder.  I’m thinking either Windows or my ISP did the deed, and my computer has been amusing itself by sucking oddities out of my mail ever since.

When I get emails full of beautiful landscapes or adorable animals, I may chuck them into the “Pictures & Jokes” folder.  But I’m pretty sure I didn’t save an uncaptioned, unexplained photo of an outdoor thermometer, a book of S&H trading stamps (yes, sadly, I do remember them), or an Ernie Banks trading card (who?).  There are photos of people I don’t know, catalog pictures of models in horrendous 1970s leisure suits, and various bits of wisdom from the ever-acerbic Maxine.

I found ads for Lincoln Logs, and Burma Shave, and a photo of a Skelly gas station.  Where on earth did that come from?  A shake-over-the-stove package of Jiffy Pop.  Assorted cartoons.   Various round objects posing as planets or stars in size comparisons, bringing back horrid memories of elementary school Science Fairs.  How did all these pictures get on my computer?

Lots of animals–from alligators to zebras.    Angry wet cats, always good for a laugh.  Animals in costume (none of my pets have ever been so patient).

A certain amount of bathroom humor has infiltrated my files, I can’t deny that, but I swear I didn’t collect it on purpose.  It’s those gremlins, must be.  How about bathroom humor involving angry wet cats?

And this one has me stumped.  Bottle opener?  Skate key?  Anyone know what this is?  Or why there’s a picture of it on my computer?